My desk, such as it, is littered with an assortment of handy supplies, along with the piles of paper and useless detritus that has somehow made its way here. Like a brochure from the garbage people, telling me what to do with my garbage. (I typically throw it out and let them handle it from there, but apparently there are some procedures involved.) Addresses that I have yet to put in a safe place, since I haven't yet decided on a safe place, sit around on envelopes and scribbled on pieces of paper, and nothing can be done with them until I decide on a safe place to store them. How hard could that be? Obviously it must be quite difficult, for the addresses haven't moved in quite a long time.

A box of paper clips has reappeared, after yesterday's shredding session. I am bedeviled by paper clips. They disappear, they reappear, and when I most need one they aren't to be found. It's as if they go to a secret hiding place so they can laugh at me behind my back. Or from wherever. I can't really tell where they're laughing at me from. Right now they're quite visible, but that could change as soon as I need one.

I have a cylindrical writing instrument holder filled with writing instruments that are of no use to me. Sharpies and colored pencils, none of which I use during the course of a day. When I need a pen I search frantically for one, because they hide underneath the papers, elusive little pens mostly that skitter underneath the closest stack of paper when they see me reaching for them. There's also a straw in my cylindrical writing instrument holder, wrapped, in case I should have a straw emergency. It happens.

I have my stapler and my scissors and my post-it notes, pink, on the right side, and usually they stay there, even though they're in my way. I also have a stack of used post-it notes that I should review to see if I can toss them out or not. A tiny pewter bear that's been misplaced is here. It doesn't belong here, but somehow it climbed up here anyway.

I did move the stamps and return address labels to the credenza last week, which sits not behind me, but to my right, so that's progress. Also on the credenza is a pretty red hard drive which has all my music on it. It's not currently attached to anything so it's not doing me any good. My printer sits there too, a big thing that eats expensive ink but makes pretty pictures.

I also have a variety of pharmaceuticals on my desk. They're threatening to crowd out the other occupants. My daily meds, which are kept here so I remember to actually take them, because otherwise I wouldn't think of it. Ibuprofen from yesterday, when I injured my knee. This is a dangerous job, requiring me to sit for sometimes hours, and somehow, in all that activity, I injured my knee. It's all better now. My fiber supplement, chewable berry-flavored tablets that are somewhat like candy. They'd have to be, for me to take them regularly. A container of chocolate, and I use the term loosely, calcium chews. And added just the other day, a package of Zantac. That one was a special gift from Andrew, who thought it might help. It might have.

There is flotsam all around me, on the desk, the credenza, the printer stand (which does not hold a printer, but does hold my speakers on top, with a variety of helpful office organizers that are unused, rendering them unhelpful but instead a waste of space, and paper with which to feed the voracious printer), the file cabinet to the left of me, the 3 drawer organizer next to that which has, oddly enough, an empty drawer. Two weeks ago I did a massive office organization and restructuring and brought in many things that were still in the garage from last year's move. I stopped midway through the project and have been meaning to get back to it. Meaning to do something and doing it are two entirely separate things in my world.

And now I really must do something with my office this week, before Friday, because on Friday morning my bosses, all two of them, are coming here. They've promised me donuts, which will help to ease my suffering, and I'll be quite happy to see them because they are quite entertaining (and we shall have our monthly staff meeting, just as an added bonus), and Scott will be able to fix my IP phone problem. I currently have 2 IP phones and 2 routers lying uselessly about, and one set of them will be made to work so clients can stop calling me on my cell phone. If it weren't for this, my computer issues, we could have met at a nice restaurant and they wouldn't be subjected to seeing my office, but alas, see it they must, so clean it up I must, for if they were to take a look at this they would suspect that they'd made an error somewhere in their hiring process, that perhaps there might have been a neater candidate.

And there might well have been. Neat accounting candidates are not hard to find. I have other qualities, however, such as, well, I'm entertaining. Never discount the entertainment factor. It's gotten me this far.